Before there were mallards, { {rubber washers|{pine|traffic} cones|small {rocky|cocky|icy|brown|annoying|metallic} planetoids|bollards} {floated on the surface of the {pond|water}|would emerge from nowhere, quacking and demanding your bread|occupied small bodies of still or gently-flowing water}. | Tom King {was {{|potentially} {interesting|dangerous}|stuck with {algae|people|coots} for {friends|company|comrades|conversation|entertainment}} |was a famous {actor|matress|violin quartet|kind of cement|ointment|benefactor of many lesser-known charities} |assumed the form of {a tectonic plate|an accountant|a minor newspaper} |was fascinated by {drains|small quacking {paper bags|{Irishmen|sweet wrappers|lemurs}}|telegraph poles|museum displays of {beaks|{feathers|plumage}|parrot skeletons}|{boulders|mutants|fir trees|Christmas decorations|parrots} that ate bread}}. | there were {{proto|ur|pseudo|pre|TURBO}-mallards|goats|real mallards{|||, like you see in old black and white films| and real mustard too}|bread-eating {toupés|fire hydrants|fish|telegraph poles|vortices|hedgerows}}. }